You know you're a remote viewer when...


Staff member
Ok you guys, let's make a list, you know I love RV humor. :)

You know you're a Remote Viewer WHEN . . .

You know what "ideogram" means and it has nothing to do with idiots.

You don't tell your friends that an oil spill once made you cry.

You think the voices in your head are really cool!

You totally understand why someone might confuse Jupiter with a tennis ball.

I haven't much time right now, I'll think of some later maybe. Let's make it a project! See how many good lines we can come up with. :)

P.S. By contributing you are aware that PJ will steal this public post and put it in the "Humor" section of her firedocs website, so your line might show up there. ;-)


New Member
Reading others peoples thoughts a few seconds ahead of what they are saying becomes droll and somewhat makes the conversation boring at times... ;)



You see something interesting and the first thing you think is "that would be an awesome target".

(sorry, new at this LOL)


New Member
When you play the guessing game all day long, trying to pin point clue words to file away for future reference.

~Wonder what the big topic on 12:00 news will be,...
~What color will Oprah be wearing today,...


New Member
You know you're a remote viewer when you file your family photos by gestalt or by Stage.

.....when the doctor's signature on your prescription is obviously a compound ideogram for water/mountain/manmade. put everything away in sealed opaque envelopes
coded with two four-digit numbers.

.....when you realize that all your life you have only been 30% accurate in your statements.....that is, when you were on topic.


New Member've used every RV technique you have found and you still have not won the lottery.

PS: I started out with nothing and have most of it left.

.........people ask why you stopped int he doorway...not realizing you were doing ambience practice. woke up at 2 AM in front of theTV and wondered if
you had been abducted. start painting your walls grey. answer questions with a series of one-word adjectives


I checked out your roast site.  Sooo funny.  So are the ones posted; nice :) Edited to say my favorite was the CRV with if Ingo didn't say it....mmm something ;)



You know you're a remote viewer when......

..... people find stacks of white paper all over your house with what looks like something scribbled in chinese all over it. ,,!,

..... they ask what it is you show them a feedback photo of a practice target side by side with the sketches and say, "Don't you see it?"

......they respond with, "Ummmm okay," and back away real slow like...... use that same session to prove to everyone you know that it's real....

.....everyone you show has the same reaction.... think it is because they are in shock due to your proof that psi is real.... find out a month later that everyone just thinks you're a twack job....... start getting visits from various church groups who smile a lot and speak mostly of exorcisms..... end up recruiting several people from these church groups into your own special RV club offering a chance to interact with Jesus (or Satan or whatever) through the power of RV..... find out that you are Jesus.....

........You predict your own second coming, and the beginning of the end times....... move your group into a compound in a remote area of the US claiming it is the only place that will survive the coming doom...... modify your predictions every 6 months to explain why nothing happened.......

.........every other RV group thinks your a twack job..... go into hiding for a while with a few of your most loyal students...... start offering to teach all the secrets of Remote Viewing free of charge as long as people buy your 300 dollar DVD set.....