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#414 

Date: Mon Aug 5, ?00? 4:?6 pm
Subject: A verbal, image-streaming 'symbolic' session 	dennanm



I've been trying some practice "verbally" instead of written today.
Now I'm very verbal, so this always seemed like a great idea to me,
but I never did it before.

In RV practice, usually I write 'dtt' and then a brief id, and then
some data. If I don't get some in about 10-30 seconds, I do that
again. That is missing in the verbal thing, though I can cue myself.

To my surprise, I'm having real trouble with it.  In short: I really
suck even WORSE this way than writing, LOL!  It's okay...

I'm doing "exercises" instead of long sessions, just cool down then
30 minutes for data, waiting to see enough result from one that it's
worth pursuing and putting them in my lab book.  But I do the same
cool down and such as other sessions.  But it's like the data just...
isn't... coming.  And what comes is bizarre, even when it's likely
related... symbolic, not literal.

I had this idea that my lack of participating in the singing/
songwriting that literally dominated my life from age 8 to age ?6
might be related here; and even, symbolically, that my lack of having
anybody living near me I can talk with, and all my friends having to
be via email, related; that on some level I am 'not expressing'
verbally anymore, putting everything in writing instead.  So it might
be some time doing this to sort of open up to it. It'll be good for
me I suppose.

The target was a civil war target, a setup the confederates had of a
line of wooden barrells and such for their soldiers to get behind (as
opposed to a trench? ), preparing for an oncoming battle.  The photo
was B&W.

I did half an hour on tape, a lot of silence, and about a dozen or
more comments most of which had ZERO to do with the target -- but
actually, I knew that, I knew they didn't, I knew they were daydreams
or bleedthroughs and such.  I suppose it's good that I knew.

The two pieces of data that probably did relate, I "got directly" --
not an 'accidental daydream' but literally a SURPRISE to me, so I
figured they were related, and they were.  Another I wasn't sure
about - but again it was so 'symbolic' as opposed to just 'sitting in
on' an experience elsewhere like a daydream, that I thought it might
relate, and it did.  So while it's nice that I had SOME clue WHICH
pieces of data might relate to the target, on the other hand, the
vast majority of what I got during the process had zero relation to
the target.

Perhaps my writing is more subconsciously-filtered?  I don't know.  I
find it interesting that what data I DID get that might be related is
very heavily "symbolic" instead of literal.  That is not normal for
me in terms of RV (though I'm highly symbolic in my meditations? ).

FWIW here are the little data points gotten through a sort of 'image
streaming' and 'verbal' session --

"There was a finger pointed. As if the person was standing beside or
behind me, I saw only the arm and the finger over my right shoulder,
pointing ahead. And I followed it and looked, and it was like the
moon went in front of the sun, and everything turned grey and dark,
and I wondered if this was like a foreboding."

"Wow. Wow! Like - a skeleton - and blood and - and the skeleton
screaming - and there's something raised in its arms, I don't know
what, like a gun, a scythe, a bat - it was like a PICTURE, actually
like a picture on a wall shown me."  (But initially vivid and
shocking, then as I backed away, I saw it was like a heavily painted
portrait.? )

"Weird, it was like there was this multi-story hospital, where people
get in the elevator and then disappear forever."

PJ